A Cat Named Winter
by zombified419
Summary: Winter made Bucky feel more like himself, something he'd almost lost. She gave him comfort, love, reminded him of who he was, and even gave him the courage he needed to talk to people he wouldn't normally, not now, because he wasn't who he was before, but Winter made him want to be. He loved and needed her as much as she did him. Then he met Steve. [Stucky]
1. Winter's Soldier

_**HUD: I know what you're thinking: 'Why the FUCK is she doing another chaptered fic when she has, like, 6 to finish?!' And, in my defense, this wasn't meant to be chaptered, it just...happened. So enjoy. :)**_

 _ **WARNING: Mentions of PTSD and anxiety, in case that's a trigger for you. Be prepared.**_

* * *

James 'Bucky' Barnes never thought he'd be normal again, never thought he'd be able to function after _everything._ Relearning mobility in his left arm at twenty-eight had been difficult. He'd had the entire thing taken off in an IED explosion overseas that landed his ass back state-side, but luckily he had some friends in high places that secured him a metal prosthetic. He was the first for the new test model, which was in of itself a pretty high honour, but even that reminder didn't help when the damn thing froze or clamped up around a ceramic mug that never stood a chance. Bucky went through quite a few plates and glasses those first weeks. He still wasn't fond of any gentle activities with his left hand, even almost a year later.

In fact, he was even more surprised to be where he was. His therapist had suggested a pet of some kind, something for Bucky to take care of and was entirely dependent upon him. Bucky fought long and hard against the idea; he had enough trouble taking care of himself, let alone a dog or whatever. Mrs. Keith said he would be fine, that she believed in him and that she thought he was ready.

Standing outside of a pet store made it feel a little too _real,_ and he suddenly felt like he had no reason being there. The stress and anxiety of even _being_ there was starting to close in. He'd barely left his apartment for the last few months except to frequent the twenty-four hour grocery store a few blocks from his apartment and to see Mrs. Keith.

Here he was about to adopt a creature that would require care, and love, and Bucky, well, Bucky hadn't really had his head screwed on right for a little over a year.

A woman and her child brushed by him and into the shop. Bucky blinked, coming back to himself. Sure having an essential life crisis almost directly in front of the door to a pet store was a little inconvenient to others, but Bucky couldn't think of a better time, _really,_ to have his little moment. Maybe if he left now, walked back to his idling cab, he could ignore Mrs. Keith's concerns for a few more weeks at _least -_

"Hello?"

Bucky barely contained his surprise, this time. He looked at the now held open door to see a young girl, maybe in her mid-teens, making as much eye contact with him as he'd allow.

When he didn't answer, she continued: "Were you wanting to come in?"

Bucky gave a jerky nod, which prompted a wide smile to spread on her face. She held the door wider, even, and waved him in. "Awesome! My name is Karen, and I'd love to help you today."

Karen was sweet, albeit awkward with a few of Bucky's muttered answers to her questions. Her heart was in the right place. Bucky had originally entertained the idea of fish or whatever, something _easy,_ but Mrs. Keith shot it down faster than some of Bucky's own sniper shots. Karen suggested a hamster or a gerbil; just the idea of something so _small_ made Bucky's metal hand clench. Even in his long sleeves and gloves, the whir was unmistakeable, but Karen never asked and they moved to something bigger and much, much less _fragile._

Bucky was about as antisocial as they come (which was odd for him; before the accident, he'd been a regular busy body) so a dog was totally out of the question. They were too needy, would require more of Bucky's stability than he could really afford to give. While Karen cooed at a few puppies, calming them from their excitement at seeing a new face, Bucky felt eyes on the back of his head.

Immediately the hairs on the base of his neck twitched and prickled. Bucky took a measured breath, tuning out the yaps and caws of distraction to zero in on what had spotted him. It was an old habit, a _good_ habit, but he'd been a civilian for over a year, and despite all his anxiety and nightmares, no one was after him.

In this case, he'd been right - someone was watching, or rather, some _thing._ Over his shoulder he spotted bright blue, staring right back at him. _Beautiful._ A cat, snow-white with a single black patch over her left ear. Her eyes tracked his movements; he shifted his weight, stepped around Karen, even moved towards the hamsters again. Her eyes seemed to only be for him, and that thought brought a warmth to Bucky he hadn't felt in some time.

"Karen," he muttered. The teen stood up abruptly, quickly used to his low voice. "That cat."

Karen looked the same direction Bucky did, his eyes still locked with the white cat. Karen hummed, a wide smile on her young face. "I don't know _why_ I didn't just start here!"

She walked over to the cage where the cat sat, her gaze wavering for only a moment to Karen as the girl unlocked the door. Karen held her hand out first, which was inspected with a light sniff, before waving Bucky over.

"She's young, we believe around eight months," Karen said when Bucky stood beside her. He swallowed, listening to the teen prattle on. Everything she said matched the card on the cage: eight months, spayed, female, friendly, sweet, doesn't like being held. Bucky swallowed.

"Go on." Karen smiled at him, again, and nodded towards where the cat seemed content to wait. "She's awfully friendly, even to strangers. She probably won't let you pick her up, but she loves being scratched under her chin."

Bucky swallowed the lump in his throat. The cat's sky blue eyes were fixated on him, on his every motion. He swore she probably watched his throat work for a solid five seconds before looking back at Bucky's eyes. Carefully, he reached his right hand out. She stood up for him, met his fingers (she hadn't done that for Karen, no, Karen had to come to _her)_ and eagerly rubbed the side of her face against Bucky's calloused fingers. Bucky felt a small smile grace his lips as those gorgeous eyes closed contently and a loud purr vibrated against his fingertips.

He heard Karen sigh beside him, almost drowned out by the loud purring. "I believe we've found your Forever Home, girl."

Bucky left shortly after the paperwork was signed with a cardboard carrier, light in his grip. The occasional curious mew chirped on the cab ride home, but otherwise the cat was content.

Oddly enough, so was Bucky.

* * *

Bucky had to cat-proof his apartment. He settled his new housemate into his bigger-than-average bathroom and immediately left to gather supplies. A trip to PetSmart and $350 later, Bucky had more than enough essentials to last a long few months. He carefully set up her litter box in his laundry room, her dinner dishes on the kitchen counter, her bed by the door to his room, and her myriad of bright and jiggling toys in a box by his entertainment unit. He even bought her a collar, a bright blue that stood out against her soft fur and _almost_ matched her eyes (Bucky stood there embarrassingly long comparing blue collar to blue collar to get as close as possible, and finally broke down and asked an attendant, which was a mild break through for him).

Finally, he sat on his couch after opening the bathroom door, and watched. She came out immediately, stepping proudly around Bucky's living room. From what Karen said, this was unusual. Karen explained that cats take longer to get used to new surroundings and to not be upset if she didn't actively explore. That seemed to not be the case.

The cat was still so young and still so _kitten._ She climbed over every piece of furniture she could, losing her balance only a few times. She couldn't quite make her way to the kitchen, where her food and litter were, so Bucky stood up and guided her. She followed him effortlessly, and when he tapped his fingers on the counter, she jumped up without a second thought. Bucky felt a rush of affection for the little cat, her eyes so wide and her little stump of a tail twitching.

It took a week for Bucky to name her. He went out for a quick trip for a pack of smokes with a spoken promise to her that he'd only be gone for twenty minutes, tops. Her little tail and ears twitched, her face contorting into something akin to concern. Bucky assured her again and was surprised to see the wrinkle on her forehead ease. She rubbed against his legs when he stopped to pat her back.

When Bucky returned (in fifteen minutes), his little purr monster was no where to be found. Bucky had a good few minutes' worth of panic as he rucked up his bedsheets to see if she was stuck under the bed (again), checked behind the couch, in his closet, and when he started back for the door to make sure he hadn't left it open when he came in, he heard her purring.

Bucky listened and followed and found her in his fridge. Somehow, she'd gotten the door open and wormed her way inside, the door shutting behind her. Bucky blinked at her, and she blinked right back at him amongst his milk jug, apples, and beer bottles. Bucky sighed but smiled, reaching in carefully to see if she would let him rescue her. She did, surprising Bucky to no end when she seemed to go limp in his grasp as he pulled her to his chest and shut the door with his hip.

"Damn, cat, you're 'bout frozen," he murmured, grinning when she swatted lightly at his long hair. It was a lazy swat with absolutely no heat to it, her soft and cold paw settling against Bucky's nose. Her white fur was chilled, but she didn't seem hurt. "Your feet're chilly, too, like winter."

It clicked. Bucky blinked, looked back at the icy eyes staring out at him with an obvious mischief and contentment. "You're Winter. Ya like that?"

He was answered by another playful swat and a purr so deep Bucky felt some of the ice around his own heart melt.

* * *

Bucky stood, adjusting Winter's collar to settle snug but not too much against her slim throat, leaning back once he was finished. She sat up proudly, her chin raised for his inspection. Bucky chuckled, rubbing her cheek with his thumb. "Lookin' good, doll."

Winter purred, tilting into his touch. The kitchen lights reflected off of the tag riveted into her collar. _WINTER,_ in all caps, above his cell number in case the worse happened. She was microchipped by the pet store, but Bucky didn't want her to end up at a pound when he could just be called.

Winter stepped over to him from her perch on the kitchen counter, putting her delicate paws on his chest. Bucky smiled; for a cat he was told didn't like to be held, Winter certainly wasn't above begging for it. He carefully wrapped his right arm around her and hoisted her up to his shoulder. She settled in quickly and he walked them to the couch.

* * *

It was a bit of a struggle for Bucky to get Winter to use her cat bed. She took naps and played with a few toys there, but when Bucky was settling down for the night she was practically connected at his hip. She was warm and pliant when they sat together on the couch, but Bucky was awake for that. The idea that he may have a bad night with her so close and possibly hurt her was too much to handle. Bucky told himself it was for Winter's own good that she stayed out in the living room, even if the pathetic meows haunted him.

He persevered, and for good reason, when during the second week Bucky had one too many flashbacks for his liking and woke up in a cold sweat with a pillow clenched too tight in his metal hand. Bucky heard light scratching on the door but ignored it. The pillow was a glaring factor, all he could think of was it being Winter's soft fur clenched under his fist.

Bucky rolled over and ignored the way his heart hurt from the insistent scratching on his door.

The second time it happened that week, Bucky wondered if he adopted a ghost or a cat. He woke up panting, gasping, his vision black at the edges with gunfire still ringing in his ears. When he sat up, something _warm_ settled against his side, his left hip. His first instinct was _Remove,_ and as his left hand settled over it a soft mewl snapped him back to the present. Bucky blinked and looked.

Winter was there, pressed against his left side, _beneath his metal palm._ Bucky felt a frisson of fear jolt through him at what he had been about to do. Winter, chucked across the room with the force of a semi, flashed a vision Bucky immediately screwed his eyes closed to. The cat in question only purred, all of her trust unwittingly placed in Bucky. Bucky sighed, feeling the tension in his body begin to seep away.

The metal arm was made incredibly well. Bucky could feel pressure and temperature, could perform day-to-day activities, hell, he could even _crochet_ if he wanted to. But he couldn't feel Winter's fur. He could feel _her,_ her warmth and the rise and fall of her back as she breathed, but he missed the softness of her fur.

Still, having his hand over her back prompted him to pet her, and just the action was soothing. Winter didn't seem to mind the difference from his right hand, either. Soon her purrs traveled up his fingers and made the metal vibrate. Bucky chuckled, despite himself, finally relaxing.

If his little delicate kitten didn't mind his metal monstrosity, perhaps he could, too.

* * *

Every time Bucky went to see Mrs. Keith now, he brought with him photos of Winter. She was largely photographic, perching perfectly or tilting just so that Bucky had dozens of pictures to show off. Mrs. Keith's proud smile was more than worth the extra effort, even if it wasn't even _that,_ either.

Winter made Bucky remember what he was like before he left, before the last tour that went so horribly. Mrs. Keith suggested seeing if Winter would take to walking, and Bucky grinned so wide his face hurt. He stopped by PetSmart again to ask a few questions and left not too long after with a matching blue harness and leash to compliment her collar.

Winter, for all of her curiosity, was so easy to leash train Bucky almost cried. He took her with him to check his mail, picking her up when he took the stairs instead of the elevator, took her out when he went for his smokes, and, if he felt daring, when he went grocery shopping.

Mrs. Keith signed a note to have Winter be a certified service animal, which Bucky immediately cashed in. He got a laminated card for his wallet and a special tag that hung proudly from Winter's collar. She loved going outside, to the store, to visit Mrs. Keith (who always had a treat for her); anywhere Bucky went, she was there.

Winter made Bucky feel more like himself, something he'd almost lost. Anytime they were out, if something made Bucky feel less like himself or his trauma flared, she was suddenly there. Pawing at his jeans, rubbing his knees, asking to be held, meowing softly until Bucky came back to himself. He loved and needed her as much as she did him.

* * *

They were sitting on a park bench under a tree, Bucky propped against the armrest with a book in his left hand, his right idly stroking Winter in his lap. There was a cool early fall breeze, stirring up leaves enough to distract the cat. Soon she jumped down only in her harness, stalking closer to the swirl of leaves. Bucky looked over his book to keep an eye on her. Her leash was in his jacket pocket, but he wasn't worried about her taking off. They'd been together a few months, now, and she never went too far without him.

Winter crouched low to the pavement, her little rump and stump of a tail in the air. Bucky watched her butt wiggle, her tail twitching. She was off in a split second, front legs spread wide with claws extended. Bucky chuckled as she caught a few of the dead ones, crumpling under her mighty attack. Bucky clapped enthusiastically, drawing her attention. Her pupils were so wide with adrenaline that the blue Bucky adored was nearly gone. She twitched her black ear at him before taking off after more leaves. Bucky smiled and settled back with his book.

Winter made enough noise that Bucky knew where she was without looking; he only glanced up when a jogger cruised by or someone cooed at her. Winter continued to play, allowed for a pat or two, before moving back to the death of the leaves.

One jogger in particular caught Bucky's attention, breezing by everyone else, including himself and Winter. He was tall, taller than Bucky's just under six, dressed in gym shorts and black sneakers with a grey shirt that was maybe a size too small. His sneakers hit the pavement rhythmically, propelling his muscular form with an ease that spoke of routine. Bucky had long put his book down as he watched Winter and now moved his gaze to the handsome jogger.

He didn't stay in Bucky's sight for long, so when he came back around the track ten minutes later Bucky looked his fill. Broad shoulders that tapered down a ripped chest and abdomen into narrow hips, finishing with strong thighs and legs that made Bucky swallow and bite his bottom lip with each echoed _slap_ on the pavement.

Since his return, he'd hardly _looked_ at anyone else, let alone found anyone even remotely attractive. This jogger was the first person to catch his eye, and Bucky had to fight down his grin. Having Winter really _did_ do wonders for him, dragging him out of his shell of a home to the outside world that continued on whether Bucky was ready for it or not. Him ogling this guy was nothing new to Bucky before, but a lot had changed over the years, even more the last few months. Yet another thing he owed Winter.

The jogger ran the track three more times (yes, Bucky _did_ count) during Bucky's stay. After the jogger's fifth lap, Bucky called for Winter to come back, feeling hunger set in. The cat sat up, stretched and yawned, before lazily crossing over the pavement to Bucky. She was covered in bits of her enemies, leaves stuck to every patch of her fur and turning his white cat calico. Bucky grinned and shook his head; she'd be getting a bath later, for _sure._ A gust kicked up more leaves on the path, distracting his dirty cat again.

Winter was a good ten feet away when Bucky heard that familiar rhythmic pounding of sneaker on pavement. He was surprised to see the same jogger again, the sun glinting off of his blond hair and turning it gold. He was looking down at his phone, presumably changing the song he was listening to, and heading straight for Winter. Bucky felt his heart sink.

There was no way he'd be able to get to Winter in time; the jogger was going too fast. Winter looked up, hearing the other person approaching, and rolled over. Bucky wanted to scream, cursing all those other people who had touched _his cat_ during their stay and made her feel comfortable enough to lay down on the pavement.

"Winter!" Bucky called desperately; she twitched and sat up, but the jogger was too close and Bucky had to do _something._

He sprinted over and intercepted the jogger, wrapping both of his arms around the man's waist and taking them both down. It'd been a lot time since Bucky had tackled someone to the ground, and it brought an uncomfortable tightness to his chest that didn't stop even as their bodies collided with grass.

The man landed under Bucky with a cough and a curse; Bucky had practically launched himself at the poor guy. It took a few seconds for them to stop skidding. When they did, Bucky attempted to free himself from the tangle of their limbs.

The jogger flipped Bucky over and under him in a second flat, both of his hands pressing Bucky's arms to his side. Bucky willed his body to _relax,_ but the shift from protecting his cat to now protecting _himself_ was too much too soon, and Bucky could feel his anger and _fight or flight_ flaring up. He screwed his eyes shut.

"What the _hell,_ man?" The jogger had a deep voice, slightly breathless from Bucky's assault. Bucky swallowed but didn't answer, keeping his eyes shut. The pressure on his arms lessened, but Bucky pressed his lips together in a thin line, breathing in and out of his nose.

Then, all of a sudden, it stopped. The pressure building in his chest, the echoing of his blood pounding in his ears, the need to fight or _die,_ it all just stopped. Bucky focused, tried to figure out _why_ (because right then, this, was _not_ something he'd come along enough to combat on his own) when he felt it.

Soft nuzzles on his left hand, his metal fingers. A low _merr,_ a questioning noise, an _Are you okay?_ And suddenly, he was, because Winter was there. She pressed against his fingers again, bumping her head and mewling along to his wrist. His breaths came easier, and he allowed himself to open his eyes.

The jogger was still over him, still pinning his arms, but his attention was on the little white cat with a bobbed tail in the blue harness and collar, slinking up Bucky's left. She moved along until she could reach his face, a ritual they'd started when Bucky had a bad night and had trouble grounding himself, and bumped his nose. He felt a small smile grace his lips as his heart finally slowed.

"What's her name?"

Bucky blinked and moved his gaze from his cat's beautiful eyes to those of the man's above him and felt his throat clench.

 _His eyes were the same blue as Winter._

"...Winter," Bucky answered, ignoring how rough he sounded. The jogger smiled, then, and leaned back off of Bucky to sit in the grass a foot or so away. Bucky sat up himself when Winter patted his shoulder with her paw.

"She's gorgeous," the jogger complimented. Bucky nodded and scratched under her chin. Her purr vibrated through his wrist.

"Thanks," Bucky answered, feeling another smile tug. He kept his eyes on Winter, unsure about looking at the man he'd just tackled. He felt awfully nervous.

The jogger seemed content to not speak, watching Bucky's fingers work behind Winter's ears and under her collar. The metal Service Animal tag clinked against his steel fingers. The sound was soothing, urging him to finally speak again.

"I'm, uh, sorry. For tackling you," Bucky ventured, as if charting new territory. This, after all, was the longest conversation he'd had with a stranger since Karen the pet store clerk.

The jogger chuckled, a sound that started deep in his chest. Bucky felt warm. "It's alright. I should've been paying more attention. I saw her earlier, when she was playing with the leaves. Shoulda been watchin' instead of messin' around on my phone."

Bucky took in his posture, sitting with his legs up and his arms over his knees, one hand holding the other at the wrist. His body language was open and kind, his blue _blue_ eyes still watching Winter. Bucky followed the line of earbuds along his neck and down his chest, ending in his left pocket. He was glad he didn't have to explain.

"I called for her," Bucky answered. Winter opened her eyes, sensing the conversation was still about her. "She can be stubborn, sometimes."

"Looks like she was goin' for a kill," the jogger teased. Winter took that moment to give a shake, ridding her fur of some of the dead leaves. She nudged against Bucky's hand where it had stilled its stroking, standing up and crossing over to the jogger. Bucky watched his eyes light up as he held out a hand, palm up, for her to inspect. She sniffed the pad of his fingers and thumb before unceremoniously diving in for a petting.

Bucky listened to that low chuckle again as the blond scratched under Winter's collar, as Bucky had. She turned to putty in his palm, his large hands making her look much smaller than her age. Bucky could hear the purring from his seat and smiled.

"I'm Bucky," he said, offering his right hand. The jogger looked up, his eyes crinkled from his bright smile. He swapped his petting hand for his left and took Bucky's hand in his right, his arms crossed comically.

"Steve," he answered. Steve's smile seemed to get impossibly _brighter_ as they briefly shook hands. Bucky felt a grin to match Steve's growing and he _may_ have kept his hand a touch too long.

Later, when Bucky clipped Winter's leash on and they began their walk home, Steve jogged by them with a wave and smile, his earbuds back in place. Winter swatted at his legs and trotted to keep up as much as her leashed allowed. Bucky just waved back with a soft smile, watching his cat slow with an audible huff. Once she was back by his side, Bucky watched Steve.

He tried not to think about how warm his hand had been in his, or how strong his chest felt when they slid through the grass. Bucky followed the lines of grass stains along Steve's left, grimacing slightly from guilt. He'd apologized, though, and he'd do anything for Winter, no questions asked. Those stains would come out, but Winter was irreplaceable.

She gave him comfort, love, reminded him of who he _was,_ and even gave him the courage he needed to talk to people he wouldn't normally, not _now,_ because he wasn't who he was before, but Winter made him want to be.

Bucky watched until he couldn't see shining blond hair anymore and closed his eyes against the sun.

* * *

 _ **A/N: Thoughts? :) Also, I now have a tumblr *gasp* and have no idea how to use it.**_ ** _www . tumblr blog / zombified419 But you can follow me! :)_**


	2. Along Came Steve

_**HUD: Some advancement, both with and because of Winter. ;)**_

* * *

Bucky clipped Winter's harness on and picked her up; he grabbed his wallet, phone, and keys before turning to leave the apartment. He waited until he was downstairs before he set her down, brushing off her white fur from his shirt. She immediately slinked around his legs, rubbing against his jeans and purring. Bucky smiled; she did that every time they left the apartment, just happy to be out.

Bucky stepped onto the curb and she followed. They were going to the store, Bucky feeling a need to spoil himself and his little kitty. He led her at a leisurely pace, stopping occasionally when someone wanted to pet her or the crowds became too thick for her to safely walk. Bucky didn't mind people patting Winter; she'd never had any professional training for her certification, just a prescription, basically, written out by Mrs. Keith. All in all, she was a leash trained cat that helped Bucky feel more like a human than other humans did.

Bucky paused, waiting for the light of the crosswalk to go green for them, and cradled Winter to his chest. She immediately scrambled to his shoulder, her lean body pressed against his neck and face. Bucky let her enjoy her perch as he crossed the street; they'd done this enough that he wasn't concerned with her losing her balance as long as he kept a mild pace.

They made it to the grocer with minimal fuss. Bucky grabbed a basket and coaxed her to sit in the seat; once Winter was all settled, Bucky started for the meat section. He began to hum lightly under his breath as he looked around, trying to decide between fish or chicken or steak, when the woman a few feet ahead of him caught his attention.

She's pretty and slim, dressed a little too well for food shopping, but that's not what has his attention. It's who she's talking to, a toddler in the same seat as Winter, and smiling and giggling at her voice. Bucky didn't mean to listen, but he overhears: "Do you want chicken tonight, Billy? Chicken sure is tasty!" Her voice is pitched higher, and the sound has her son cooing and giggling again. "Chicken it is!" She announced, pulling a pack of chicken breasts out and adding it to her cart. Bucky watched her walk away before looking at his basket.

Winter is sitting up, like a child would, with her back against the bars and facing him. Bucky looked at her, then at where the woman and child had gone, and felt a stupid grin break out over his face.

"Ya want chicken tonight, Winter?" he asked her, his grin spreading at his own joke. "How 'bout steak? Or salmon?" At the mention of salmon, his beautiful cat presses one of her paws on his metal hand holding the cart. His grin is face breaking, now.

"You want salmon, doll? It sure is tasty!" When Winter actually _answers_ him with a meow, Bucky had to bite his lip to stop from laughing.

"Salmon it is, then!" He said triumphantly, turning and backtracking a few feet to the fish counter and smiling brightly at the attendant, whom Bucky would bet money had been watching him subtly lose his mind.

Bucky can't find it in himself to care.

He ordered two six ounce pieces to be cut and leaned his weight on his cart. Winter watched the glass with obvious interest, her ears and little stump tail flicking. Bucky's smile softened, looking at his companion. Winter, being more in tune with Bucky's emotions than he was sometimes, looked up at him with her blue eyes and mewed.

Yeah, she was about as close to a kid as he'd ever get.

* * *

Bucky cooked his salmon with teriyaki and rice, Winter's with just a little bit of salt. He set to work pulling the fish apart for her with two forks, occasionally blowing steam away. Winter sat patiently on the counter behind him, watching his every move. It make Bucky chuckle.

While they were eating, Bucky's cell rang. He read Mrs. Keith's office number and immediately picked up.

"Mrs. Keith?" Bucky asked, worry in his tone. She never called him.

 _"Hey there, Bucky. How are you? I hope I'm not interrupting."_ Her voice was still so soothing, even over the phone.

Bucky shook his head, even though she couldn't see it. "Not at all, just dinner with Winter. Took her to the store and she wanted salmon; you know how she gets, sometimes."

Mrs. Keith laughed, the sound tinkling over his poor reception. _"She can be a handful."_

"Always," Bucky answered, smiling at his kitty. "What can I do for you, Mrs. Keith?"

 _"I unfortunately have to cancel tomorrow,"_ Mrs. Keith sighed. _"I have a bit of an emergency that I have to handle in California. I shouldn't be gone for more than a month, at best."_

"Alright," Bucky answered.

 _"Will you be okay?"_

Bucky looked at Winter again. "Yeah, I'll be just fine." He realized he wasn't lying, either. He really would be, with Winter around.

 _"I'm glad,"_ her voice said she meant that, too. _"Well, take care, Bucky. Please call my cell if you need me."_ He wrote the number down she gave him and wished her a safe trip dealing with whatever was dragging her across the country.

Bucky turned back to his dinner, mixing the rest of his fish and rice and tapping the plate with his fork. He now had a free afternoon with no responsibilities or obligations. Technically two, but his other canceled appointment wasn't for another two weeks from tomorrow, so he had some time to think about that one.

Bucky thought about the last day he'd had a 'free' afternoon and felt a flush creep up his neck. He'd not been back to the park since the day he'd met Steve, the literal most handsome man in existence, and tackled him to the grass. Bucky cleared his throat, which drew Winter's attention. She licked her jowls as she stared at him.

"Wanna go to the park tomorrow?" He asked. She mewed and licked her jowls again.

"Cool," he replied before taking another bite of his salmon. He had absolutely no ulterior motives, but he wondered if Steve would be there.

* * *

Bucky didn't have a good night, waking drenched in sweat and panting. He blinked away the blackness from his vision and gulped deep breaths. Bucky swung his eyes around his room, focusing on each piece of furniture until the tinge of an orange desert disappeared completely and he only saw his room bathed in shadows and moonlight.

Winter was there, mewling and butting his hand until he uncurled his fist and scratched behind her ears. He tried to regulate his breathing to something normal as he stroked along her soft ears and under her collar, the tag clinking against his fingers.

Finally Bucky drifted back to sleep when Winter crawled onto his chest, some hours later, warm and grounding.

* * *

Bucky didn't feel like going to the park after the restless sleep he'd gotten. He went through the motions of his shower and dressing, only bothering to towel dry his hair before he pulled it into a bun. He ate cereal but didn't taste it, brushed Winter's short coat a few times before she squirmed away and fetched her own harness, knowing that they were late for their date with the park. Bucky cracked a smile and clipped her harness on, grabbing a new book and setting off.

They walked slowly to the park, Winter often tugging Bucky to keep him moving. Of course the one time he assures Mrs. Keith he'd be fine without her help, he has one of the worse nights he's had since Winter came to the picture. His gorgeous kitty was doing her best to distract him, but when they reached their previous bench at the park, he unclipped her leash and sat down with a deep sigh.

It was a beautiful day, the sun high and bright, a slow breeze to keep its heat at bay, and Bucky's bench was still hidden well beneath shade. Still, his book sat unopened to his right and his hands sat folded in his lap. Winter stared up at him from the grass she sat on and blinked.

"Wanna play, doll?" He offered, pulling out a toy he'd stuffed into his coat on the way out. Her eyes sharpened and tracked the movement of the feather ball Bucky held in his left hand. He smiled and tossed it into the grass; Winter immediately pounced, batting the jingle ball between her paws.

Bucky watched her for a few minutes with a smile before fatigue set back in. He was exhausted, the nightmare took too much of him to deal with. Bucky stretched out across the bench he sat on, pulling his book over as a feeble distraction. He read the same page four times when he couldn't recall what was going on before he gave up and let the book fall open over his chest. Bucky pillowed his hands behind his head as he stared up at the trees above him, swaying lightly in the breeze. He let out a sigh and listened to the leaves rustle, the soft tinkle of Winter's jingle ball, the joggers on the path to his left; Bucky felt his heavy eyes begin to close.

It was a large testament to his exhaustion that Bucky drifted off at all, but even more so that he didn't register the shift in temperature when a new shadow lingered over him. He knew Winter was on his chest, around where the book had been, but Bucky wouldn't put it pass his cat to push it away so she could be in her spot. Her weight was warm and comforting, giving his tired self a sense of safety, until a deep voice drew him out.

"Hey, Bucky?"

Bucky's eyes flew open, his metal hand scrambling to keep Winter close and protected as his right landed on the back of the bench and pushed himself to an immediate sitting position.

"Woah, hey!" Bucky blinked and looked over and _up_ at Steve, who jerked back like he'd been burned. The way he was standing, with both hands at chest level, made Bucky think he'd been leaning over him. His tone was amused when he smiled crookedly at Bucky. "I didn't mean to startle you."

Bucky took a shallow breath and ran a hand down his face. He felt relaxed, more than he should be, with Steve having been the one to wake him up. At least it wasn't a total stranger. "'S fine," Bucky answered, his voice rough from sleep. He licked his teeth, feeling his nerves prickle. "Everything okay?"

"Oh sure," Steve answered, his attitude sunny and bright, like the fall afternoon. "I've just been runnin' by, and I noticed you'd dropped this." Bucky pulled his gaze from Steve's so blue eyes to his hand, Bucky's abandoned book being offered back to him. Bucky, still with one hand on Winter, took the book gingerly.

"Thanks," Bucky said and offered a small quirk of a smile. He was surprised to see a soft pink flush start at Steve's neck and creep up to his face as he smiled.

"No problem," Steve said. He was still smiling and blushing, obviously pleased, and Bucky was glad Steve had woken him up over just returning his fallen book and not something more disturbing. The expression looked good on Steve, too. It made Bucky feel warm, similar to the warmth that Winter brought him, but this one was deeper.

The moment stretched on, probably beyond what any sane person would call 'normal' before Bucky cleared his throat and tilted his head towards the seat beside him, now open without his legs occupying the entire bench. "Wanna have a seat?"

"Yeah," Steve said with a nod. He sat with a small sigh, his muscled legs stretched out before him. Bucky swept a casual gaze along Steve's sneakers to his knees. Winter, who had been passive during their exchange, squirmed against Bucky's chest until he let her go and could crawl over to Steve.

Steve looked down from where his head had been resting against the back of the bench and grinned at her. She mewed and pawed at his thigh until he scratched at her ears.

"I hadn't seen you in a while," Steve said, drawing Bucky's attention from his cat. "Thought you'd stop coming by, after I nearly trampled her."

Bucky snorted and shook his head. "Honestly wouldn't be here if she hadn't begged me."

"Yeah?" Steve turned his grin from Winter to Bucky, his blue eyes twinkling. "Why's that?"

Bucky hesitated for a moment. There was just something about Steve, something so honest and earnest that he felt like Steve would never judge him or look at him any different. He sincerely hoped he was right.

"Bad night," Bucky said carefully, wondering if that would be enough to satisfy Steve. When he didn't press, his blue eyes open and accepting, Bucky shared a little more. "I, ah, spent some time overseas. A lot came back with me."

Steve nodded, his too big hand still turning Bucky's cat into a purring mess. "I did, too."

Bucky felt his brows draw up in surprise. "Where? When?"

"Kuwait for clean-up, then Iraq after 9/11," Steve offered. He carefully drew Winter into his lap. "I retired soon after that last tour. I always thought I'd be career military, but I knew there wasn't much more I could do over there. I was part of a classified mission, and after, I got out."

Bucky nodded, understanding himself what he was and wasn't allowed to talk about, even now. "What'dya do now?"

"Work for the FDNY," Steve said with a hint of pride. "It was hard to get back into things after being away for as long as I was, but the guys took me under their wing pretty quickly. Made a few good friends, and I'm happy with my choice."

Bucky felt himself smiling, glad to know that someone as bright as Steve wasn't as much as a fuck up as he was. He could hardly keep a civil conversation with people, let alone make new friends.

Wasn't that what he was doing now, right then? Steve was still talking to him even after he'd tackled him a few weeks before, and Steve had been the one to come see _him._ Maybe tackling Steve had been more of a stroke of genius than Bucky had been anticipating.

"So now I know who to call if Winter gets stuck in a tree," Bucky teased, enjoying the large smile it brought to Steve's lips.

"Steve Rogers, FDNY Brooklyn Department, saver of kittens from tress," Steve said, directing a thumb at his large chest. "At your service."

Bucky chuckled, the sound bubbling from his gut. It made Steve's grin widen. "Good to know." Winter turned to look at Bucky for the first time since Steve sat down. "You've got a city hero as a pillow, Winter. I hope you're appreciating all this."

Winter just shoved her head harder against Steve'e open palm, making them both laugh.

They talked for a while, from the book Bucky was reading to how shitty the Mets were always doing. They discussed politics lightly, Bucky not really paying anything much attention except if it pertained to any VA benefits, and just listened to Steve lament about the department losing a bit of its funding at the start of the year. He mentioned starting a fundraiser to earn the guys a little extra to spring for a fresh set of helmets.

"Not that there's anything wrong with ours now, but they're old and my team deserves the best," Steve had said, and Bucky couldn't help but feel a little bit of pride himself in the men and women that were on Steve's team. They sounded like a family, the way Steve gushed about them. Bucky found he didn't care what Steve talked about, just so he could listen to his voice sound like that.

Bucky tracked Winter, moving across Steve like she belonged there. She was such a small thing, even now over a year old. Bucky had done some research on what breed he thought she was, and the closest he could find was a Japanese Bobtail. They never got very big, usually bred small for the cramped living of Japan, and as she slinked and climbed Steve he really could tell her size, and _his._

Bucky already knew Steve was a big guy, knowing firsthand how well-built he was. Seeing his little kitty, hardly over a year old and totally done growing, pawing at his large muscles and climbing over his broad shoulders and blond head, it made Bucky smile. He could get used to seeing that, to Winter being comfortable around another person as easily as she was him, and if Winter liked Steve, Bucky hoped the man would stick around. Steve obviously passed her test.

"When I adopted Winter," Bucky heard himself saying; "The clerk told me she didn't much like being handled. That cat does absolutely nothin' but beg me for hugs and coddlin' and I always think those people don't have a lick of sense."

Steve laughed, Winter crawling under his chin to get from one shoulder to his other. "Can't say I blame her - you look like you'd give good hugs."

Bucky felt his neck flush and dipped his head to hide his grin. Winter mewled in his ear; she used Steve as a bridge to climb back over to him and was nuzzling his ear. "I suppose if you could talk, you'd tell one helluva story, doll." He scratched her chin until she slid down his chest to settled against his arm.

Bucky looked out, noticing the sun was much lower in the sky than when he'd gotten there. He felt slightly disappointed, knowing he'd have to leave Steve's side soon. Bucky turned to mention the time just when a loud grumble came from Steve.

Bucky lifted an eyebrow as Steve scratched the back of his neck. "Uh, wanna grab some food? There's a hotdog cart a block over."

Bucky couldn't fight his grin at Steve's embarrassment. "Sure thing, pal. You're a growing boy."

Bucky delighted in Steve's blush deepening but didn't say anything. Instead he focused on fishing Winter's lead from his pocket and clipping it in place. He tucked his book into his inner jacket pocket and stood up, Steve standing beside him. "Lead the way."

Bucky imagined they looked like quite the pair, two fully grown men (one looking more like a linebacker but whatever) with a dainty little cat trotting between them. Bucky ignored the looks other park-goers were tossing them, long used to stares from his arm and then when he happily carted Winter around, to care what they thought. Steve didn't seem to mind either, keeping the conversation easy between them. Bucky wondered if some of his light would rub off on him and remind him of what it was like to be a real, regular person again.

They stopped at the hotdog cart and Steve ordered two footlongs; while he dressed his food, Bucky ordered a footlong and a plain dog without a bun and diced up. He figured Winter deserved a treat after putting up with his shit from the night before.

Steve nodded towards a new bench and sat down while Bucky added ketchup and relish to his meal. Bucky took the seat open beside him and braced his knees around Winter while she munched away by his boots. His knee brushed Steve's, but neither man mentioned it. Steve ate with a fervor Bucky should have expected of a man his size, almost like it was going to be taken away if he didn't wolf it all down. They were only there because of Steve's hunger anyway, but Bucky enjoyed his hotdog, and so did Winter.

"So what have you got going on today?" Steve asked after he finished his second footlong in record time. Bucky had studiously kept his gaze forward while they ate. "I hope I haven't monopolized your whole afternoon."

Bucky shook his head, dropping his hands to his thighs. "Nah. I never have anything goin' on. I might have to go to the store later, but nothin' big."

Steve nodded. "I usually don't do much on my days off, 'cept maybe run a little longer than usual." He turned to look at Bucky. "Usually I'm here longer on Tuesday and Thursday, but I jog here every morning."

Bucky wondered if that was an open invitation or if it was just his own wishful thinking. "That's cool."

"You're welcome to join me," Steve continued, as if Bucky hadn't spoken. "It's usually early because my shifts are ten to twelve, but I could swing by if you live close or we could meet here."

Mrs. Keith would sing to the sky if Bucky agreed, and he knew that. Steve's expression was hopeful, his eyes still so bright and blue that Bucky thought he'd never get used to it, but Bucky hesitated. If he went jogging, Winter couldn't come with him. Realistically, her little legs wouldn't be able to keep up with a heavy jogging routine, and anything that Winter couldn't be a part of made Bucky weary. He wanted to say yes, to at least have more time with Steve, but without Winter...

"I'll think about it," Bucky said, offering a small smile. "Thanks."

He didn't miss the way disappointment trickled into Steve's expression, but his smile didn't waver. "Yeah, okay."

Bucky bit the inside of his cheek. "I just," he paused. "I just know Winter wouldn't be able to - "

"That's it?" Steve asked, perplexed, and Bucky cursed himself. Of course that would be the straw - it was one thing to walk a cat and have one as a service animal, but it was another thing entirely to want to literally take her _everywhere._ Bucky wondered what Steve would think of him if he knew Winter went to the grocer with him.

Then, Steve was laughing, and Bucky felt even more confused.

"Of course she can come!" Steve said, clapping a hand on Bucky's shoulder that almost made him flinch. "I don't mind slowing down a little. Having her will remind me to take a break every often, too."

Bucky felt a smile tug at his lips. "You mean that?"

"Absolutely," Steve answered with another of his blinding smiles. Bucky noticed while they spoke that Steve smiled with his entire being. It was something Bucky was rapidly beginning to enjoy about him.

"Then I'm in," Bucky said, and if it were even possible, Steve's smile grew.

Steve fished around in his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. "Program your number in for me, will ya?"

Bucky tapped away for a few moments and passed it back. "I put my name in there as Hot Crazy Cat Guy."

Steve laughed from his belly as he shot a text to Bucky. Bucky felt his phone vibrate in his pocket but left it alone, knowing he wouldn't be able to keep his own stupid grin from his face for getting Steve's number. "Well, that doesn't really narrow it down."

"You must be savin' cats from trees all the time, then," Bucky quipped, and truly surprised himself at how natural it sounded. He felt a little like himself, from before. His comment got Steve laughing again and then Bucky joined in. Winter pawed at his knee, asking in her own way to be picked up, and when he did, Steve starting giggling all over again.

That was how Steve Rogers became a more permanent part of Bucky's life. They met the next morning at the park, Winter in tow, and jogged for about an hour; they met the same time the next day, then the next, then the next. They met outside the park each day until the following Tuesday, Steve's next day off. Bucky was just getting dressed when his phone buzzed with a text. He'd been sleeping better and smoking less, now using exercise to distract himself and keep him on a regular schedule. Bucky pulled his shirt over his head and walked over.

The text was from Steve. _What building did you say you lived in again?_

Bucky felt his mouth twist into a frown. He'd never told Steve where he lived, but decided to humour him. _Three blocks from the park, corner of 5th and 47th. Why?_

 _That's on my way, so I'll pick you up. Be ready!_

Bucky blinked before a flush took over. He finished tying his sneakers and set Winter up quickly, taking the stairs down two at a time. He was just getting his breathing under control when he saw Steve jogging towards him, already sweating from exercise, even in the cool fall air. Bucky couldn't help but grin, feeling his stomach flip at how gorgeous his friend was. Once Winter spotted him she struggled to jump down. Steve waved when he spotted them and slowed down.

"Hey Buck," he said, his breath still even and a smile on his lips. "Ready?"

Bucky smiled back and nodded. "Yeah."

After that run, Bucky offered Steve some water from his apartment and he agreed. It was hardly a day later before Steve asked Bucky if he could drop by with beer and pizza, which Bucky was grateful for before his insomnia could officially kick in. It was almost like Steve could tell, and if he really could, he never said anything about it.

Before Bucky knew it, Steve was at his apartment almost every other day, even after working his thirteen hour shifts he'd still come by with some reason or other. Bucky took to keeping his fridge stocked with plenty of beer, able to offer one to Steve anytime he was there, which was becoming more often than not.

By the end of the month, Steve was always around. They still ran, but Steve spent his free days lounging on Bucky's couch or dragging Bucky down to the station to meet his other friends. Bucky didn't mind as much as he thought he would; he could still take Winter, and he had Steve's comfortable warmth at his side.

For the first time in an intolerably long time, Bucky finally felt _normal._ All thanks to Steve, whom he had tackled to save his darling of a cat from being hurt.

And Winter, who had taken to Steve immediately, and Bucky should have known he'd fall under the man's spell sooner than later right along with her. Somehow, she'd still managed to make his life that much better, and now he had Steve because of her, too.

* * *

 ** _A/N: Please let me know what you thought! I'm adoring this story, and I have ideas to continue it beyond the main plot, but I need your help! Let me know what your feelings are! Also, you can hit me up on tumblr zombified419. :)_**


	3. Little Things

_**HUD: Enjoy!**_

* * *

Bucky began to notice a few things. He noticed that he hardly smoked any more, because Steve wrinkled his nose but never said anything about it when Bucky would climb out to his fire escape; Bucky knew Steve didn't like it but respected him, so Bucky bought gum and patches and pretended to not notice Steve's small smile. Bucky didn't mind anyway, and liked the way the gum tasted.

He noticed that more and more things were creeping into his apartment, as sparse as it was. Before, he'd been a worldly guy with knick-knacks and photos and sentiment leaking from the cracks, but after, it mirrored his army life - thin, and if it wasn't a necessity to life, not around. After Winter, little splotches of colour appeared on the floor by the couch in feathers from destroyed toys or glitter from a new toy, and Bucky found he didn't much mind. He stopped cleaning it up, even if he almost broke his neck over a bright pink mouse a time or two, and didn't change that for Steve, either. If he had a problem with Winter, then Bucky told himself he could just go on 'cos it was her home, too, no skin off Bucky's teeth, nope. When Steve came over and almost killed himself over the very same mouse, grinning and blushing away as Bucky couldn't help but laugh at the big man sprawled inelegantly across his kitchen floor, Steve never said anything more than a grumble about Winter being out for him, and Bucky was more than pleased.

Winter's toys were bright and cheerful, much like the little thing herself, but it was Steve's things that Bucky loved the most. He spent more time with Bucky than at his own apartment, but Bucky never mentioned it. He never mentioned the blanket Steve brought in his duffle once when he'd crashed on Bucky's couch the night before without even a sheet because Bucky just used his bed. The soft blue throw was a favourite place for Winter to lay, and Bucky washed it with his sheets every week. Bucky never mentioned the assortment of new toys Steve brought for Winter, or the portion of his pantry that actually had _spices_ like basil and parsley and paprika because sometimes Steve cooked stupid amazing things to decompress; he never mentioned the toothbrush that made it into the cup beside his or the foreign bottle of body wash now in his shower, and he _especially_ didn't mention the small basket that wasn't his, the one that was filled with clothes that weren't his, too, all nicely folded.

He told himself - Steve spends so much time there, of course he would want to have something of his there; he told himself - it's what friends do for each other; he _tells_ himself - it's no big deal.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Mrs. Keith noticed, of course, when several of his stories revolved around Steve, his friend, his _best friend,_ whereas Mrs. Keith used to do all the talking and now Bucky's can't seem to shut up.

"How long have you two been seeing each other?" She asked casually one day weeks later, after Bucky's seen the toothbrush and feels his heart warm and stay that way, even hours later.

"I - what?" He answered dumbly, because no doubt he heard that wrong.

Mrs. Keith blinked and smiled at him. "You and Steve?"

"What, ah, what about me an' Stevie?"

Mrs. Keith recognized Bucky's denial better than he did, before he even realized it _was_ denial. "Bucky, you should say something to him. It's obvious that you care about him, and if he's half as great as you say, I'm sure he feels the same."

Bucky twitched, his hand dropping to Winter's sleeping back. She stirred but didn't move. "I don't..."

Mrs. Keith smiled indulgently; she knew Bucky better than himself. "Something tells me you do."

Bucky bit his lip and pulled Winter into his lap. She struggled for a moment before settling again beneath his palms. It really was useless to lie to her. "I do, yeah, but I don't think he does. I don't...that's what friends do, right?"

Mrs. Keith leaned back in her seat and tapped her pen against her chin. Bucky felt like she was gonna drop a bomb on him.

"Friends get together, seek each other out, yes, that's true. They comfort one another, they fill the place where loneliness might be; from what you've told me, that's not all Steve is after, and neither are you. Maybe Steve leaving things around your apartment is his way of hinting at something else he wants from you."

Bucky didn't answer her, and Mrs. Keith sent him off with well wishes and a request to think about what she said and to really look at himself, look at how he feels about Steve.

When Bucky got home, he unclipped Winter's harness and found Steve milling about in Bucky's smallish kitchen. Steve had crashed on the couch the night before, and now looked fresh and clean; Bucky bet if he walked into his bathroom it would still smell like Steve's body wash.

"Hey Buck," he said, smiling that smile that makes his entire face light up. "Made pancakes if you're interested."

Bucky smiled back and nodded.

* * *

Bucky woke with a yawn and a stretch, rolling over onto his side. Sometimes he took naps during the day, the side-effect of too much time on his hands. He felt around slightly for Winter, but couldn't find her. He blinked and sat up, finding the door to his room closed. He never closed it anymore.

Bucky pushed open the door a crack and saw Steve sitting on the floor with his legs crossed and Winter in his lap. She was swatting at his fingers, dangling just out of her reach from where she sat. He was smiling, his eyes crinkled at the corners, and still dressed from the meeting he'd had that morning. White cat hair was all over his black slacks, but Bucky knew Steve didn't care.

The sound of the door pulled Winter's attention; she meowed loudly and rolled off of Steve's lap to the carpet. Steve laughed at her and watched her slink over to Bucky. "Heya pal."

Bucky grinned lightly. "Hey, yourself," Bucky answered, his voice still thick and raspy from sleep. He must still be dizzy from it too, because he had to have imagined Steve's eyes darkening. Had to. "How'd your meeting go?"

Steve groaned, his head dropping back to expose his throat. Bucky swallowed. "Annoying; no one wants to _listen_ to us, Buck, it's frustrating."

"More budget cuts?" Bucky offered, dropping down to join his friend and cat on the floor. Winter placed her paws on his shoulders and rubbed against the stubble on his jaw. He smiled and nuzzled back at her.

"Yeah," Steve answered, and there was something off about his tone that made Bucky look back at him. Steve was smiling fondly at them, and Bucky amended his traitorous thoughts to Steve looking fondly at _Winter._ Bucky wanted to scream at Mrs. Keith for putting those weird thoughts into his head.

 _Not weird if she's just statin' what she sees._

Bucky cleared his throat and looked back at his Winter, his safe zone. "How 'bout those fundraisers? Got any planned?"

Steve shrugged and wrapped his hands around his ankles. "A few, yeah. Nothin' too big, just a bake sale comin' up and maybe a bachelor auction."

Bucky couldn't help but snort. "A _what?"_ Bucky's grin grew as a dark blush stained Steve's cheeks. "Couldn't just pose for a sexy calendar or somethin', Rogers?"

"Shut up, jerk," Steve said with little heat, but still avoided Bucky's eyes. "I, well, it wasn't my idea."

Bucky nodded. "But you got drafted, huh?"

Steve nodded miserably. Bucky laughed at his friend, even with such a morose expression on his face. As terrible as it was, Bucky couldn't help but think that even pouting, Steve was beautiful. He nudged Winter in the ribs until she sat up and looked at him; Bucky picked her up and offered her towards Steve. Winter took the hint and crawled the few feet over to him. Bucky felt his chest warm whenever Steve and Winter cuddled, and right then was no exception.

"Actually, Buck," Steve began, keeping his eyes down on Winter rolling around in his lap. "I wanna ask ya somethin'."

Bucky hummed, leaning back on his palms and stretching his legs out. His ankles stopped inches from where Steve sat and drew the man's attention. Steve seemed to steel himself before he spoke.

"I was hopin' you'd wanna help us, maybe," he paused. "Help me, actually."

Bucky tilted his chin up. "Whatcha need, Stevie?"

A light flush crept up Steve's neck again; it was terribly distracting. "I was kinda hopin' you'd, uh, that is, would you...ah, _could_ you, if you wouldn't mind - "

Bucky absolutely couldn't help it - he laughed at Steve's adorable fumbling, because for all of Steve's size and confidence he sure did stumble over words a lot. Bucky used to be better himself, but Steve has helped him more than even Mrs. Keith.

"Want me to help out at the bake sale?" Bucky offered. Steve sighed in relief and nodded.

"Yeah, if you could?" Steve smiled. Bucky nodded.

"When is it?"

"Two Saturdays away," Steve supplied. Bucky nodded again - he could do that. Steve looked back down at Winter again, dropping his hands to her soft fur and scratching her belly furiously. "I was hopin' you'd make a few of those cakes, too."

Bucky smiled; he'd had a bad day, a few weeks back, and he'd busted out his old recipes, one being for a cake his ma used to make for him. It was an apple cake, not really something you'd see too often. Steve had called to be buzzed in and found Bucky in a flour-covered kitchen with the most heavenly scent wafting from the oven. Bucky cut him a slice after it cooled and the man literally fell in love. Bucky swore it, anyway.

"You got it, punk," Bucky answered fondly, and Steve's blinding smile was more than worth it.

* * *

Mrs. Keith was by far Bucky's favourite psychiatrist; she went so far out of her way to make sure that Bucky was happy and healthy and Bucky never could think of a proper way to thank her. The government paid for her services when she saw him, but if Bucky could tip her he would. The day before the bake sale, Bucky stopped by her office with a tray of lemon bars. She squealed and grabbed him for a fierce hug.

"To what do I owe this wonderful visit?" She asked, holding her hand under her chin as she bit into a fresh bar. Powered sugar dusted her top lip.

"I'm helpin' out Stevie tomorrow, and I wanted to drop somethin' by 'fore it's all gone."

Mrs. Keith quirked an eyebrow at him, and Bucky felt his face heat. "What are you helping with?"

Bucky had been careful to not mention the sale to her, and now felt a little guilty at leaving her out. "Bake sale for his fire department. He needed some extra help an' asked me."

Mrs. Keith hummed. _"I see."_

Bucky swallowed as she took another bite. "These are delicious, Bucky."

"Thank you, ma'am."

"Steve's a lucky man."

Bucky bit his lip but didn't deny anything.

* * *

Steve stayed the night before the sale and helped Bucky put out the finishing touches on a few things. He pulled cream from the fridge and watched Bucky whip up a light frosting for his chocolate chip cupcakes, reaching over to scoop a bit out for Winter.

"She still okay to come?" Bucky asked after they were both dressed and ready. One of Steve's buddies was going to call up when he was close and help them load the bed of his truck. Steve nodded.

"Of course! Winter can be our mascot," he said with a large grin, bending down to plop Winter up on the counter. Bucky smiled back, but he felt it was a little forced. Steve must have noticed, his own grin dimming. "You okay?"

Bucky nodded, once, before sighing and frowning. Even though they'd only been friends for a few months, Bucky found himself opening up more and more to Steve and had to struggle to fool the man if he wasn't feeling one-hundred percent.

"I just," he started, shuffling his weight. "'M not good at this. Might be too much." Bucky gestured to his arm, to his _everything._ Steve frowned and shook his head.

"Don't talk about yourself like that, Bucky," Steve said. He leaned against Bucky's counter and crossed his arms over his chest, his brows furrowed. He was wearing worn jeans over his usual work boots with a well-loved FDNY blue shirt that stretched across his chest and was tucked into his jeans because Steve Rogers was really too adult sometimes. Bucky couldn't help but think about how good he looked leaning against Bucky's counter like he belonged there.

 _That's 'cos he does._

"You're gonna do fine," Steve continued, and Bucky wondered if he noticed him checking out of the conversation. "All the guys'll be nearby, and they like you plenty." Steve's expression turned less severe. "'Sides, I want you there, Buck."

Bucky ducked his head, looking up when he felt Steve's hand on his shoulder. His friend was smiling softly, his eyes shining so bright and blue, and Bucky couldn't help but get a little lost in them. "I'm with ya all the way."

Bucky bit his lip but nodded, and Steve squeezed his shoulder. He looked like he wanted to say more, but his phone started buzzing on the counter and startled a yelp out of Winter.

"Smooth, doll," Bucky commented to Winter's glare as Steve turned to answer the phone. After a short conversation, Steve slipped his wallet and phone into his pocket and grinned.

"Sam's here." Steve moved into the kitchen and started pilling plastic bins and foil tins together. Bucky clipped Winter's harness around her and stuffed her leash into his windbreaker's pocket. He packed one of her blankets and a few toys into a reusable tote and helped Steve with the rest of the goods. A knock came to his door and Steve slipped behind him to answer it.

Steve came back around the corner with Sam, whom Bucky had only met once before, a handsome man with kind eyes and a slight gap in his front teeth. "Hey Buck, you remember Sam?"

Bucky nodded and offered a smile, reaching over the counter to shake Sam's hand in his right. "Yeah, Sam Wilson, right?"

Sam nodded. "You got it, Bucky. Steve conned you into this, too?"

His tone was light and teasing, but Steve huffed. Bucky grinned. "You could say that."

Steve rolled his eyes. "Alright guys, we got people waitin' on us. Let's go."

Sam and Steve managed to carry everything except one container between the two of them, leaving Bucky with his tote of Winter's things, the cat herself, and what little was left. He locked the door and all of them piled into Sam's single cab truck, Steve opting to sit in the middle.

"Just keep outta my space, Rogers," Sam threatened, making Steve laugh and throw his arm over the seat and Bucky's shoulders. Winter had her paws against the armrest of the door, staring out the window.

"'S fine, then. Buck, you don't mind me, do ya?"

Bucky couldn't help but grin. "Well, you showered today, so..."

Sam's laughter was loud in the cab but Steve's blush was worth it.

* * *

Bucky set up Winter's little area carefully, placing her blanket down and wrapping her leash around the leg of his table. He didn't think she'd take off, but was more concerned about someone trying to take off _with_ her. Sam hung around to help Bucky lay out his goods while Steve was off talking to the rest of his team.

"So, got something to ask you, pal," Sam said after Steve stopped by to check on them.

Bucky fanned out a few napkins for the samples at the front of the table. "Yeah?"

"Steve's been pretty happy lately," Sam began, and Bucky really should have seen that coming. Sam was one of Steve's closest friends. "Haven't really seen him much lately, either. That's because of you, yeah?"

Bucky hesitated. "Dunno about the happy part, Steve's always in a good mood, but yeah, he's over a lot."

Sam leaned his hip against the edge of the table. "I saw the blanket his ma made him over the back of your couch."

Bucky felt his face flush; he hadn't known that. He knew Steve's parents had passed, that he was close with his mom, which must make that blanket pretty important. "He brought it over to crash on the couch with."

"I figured," Sam continued. "He's a big guy, Steve, but he's got a heart to match it. I just wanna make sure you know that. He's important to me, and he's been through some shit. So don't think I won't make it my business if I think he's going through more."

Bucky looked over at Sam, at his crossed arms and his sharp eyes and couldn't help but smirk. "Don't know what you're worried about, Sam. I've got no ulterior motives."

"Maybe not, but _he_ does," Sam said with an answering smirk, just as sharp as his eyes. "Steve's a good guy. Just remember that, will ya?"

Bucky looked over Sam's shoulder, to where Steve stood with a clipboard, checking in on the other tables; he felt his smirk soften. "Don't gotta tell me twice."

* * *

The bake sale was a huge success. Bucky sold out of everything rapidly, hardly having enough to keep the table full. Steve and Sam brought over the extras others made from the kitchen to keep up with the crowds, but even that didn't seem to help. Bucky felt like his old self for once; after his initial awkwardness, having Steve so close and supporting him made the old Bucky come out, the one that had a way with words that could make anyone stammer and who smiled wide and easy. Bucky denied that he did anything to help, that it was all just his baking, but Steve quickly shot him down.

"You were great, Buck," he gushed, wrapping his arms around Bucky's waist and hauling him in for a tight hug. "You sold everything, even Betty's burnt cookies!"

Bucky couldn't help the flush from staining his cheeks. "They weren't _that_ bad - "

"I think I chipped my tooth on one, man," Sam called from where he sat on the tile, playing with Winter. Steve laughed, the sound rumbling through his chest and right into Bucky. If Bucky tightened his grip because of it, Steve didn't seem to mind.

Steve let him go after a moment, but kept his hands on Bucky's waist. "Let's get everything put away and grab some food."

"Sure," Bucky answered, his hands resting on Steve's board shoulders. Steve was smiling at him softly, his eyes crinkling like Bucky liked. Bucky was close enough to notice a little bit of green in his blue eyes, too.

"I'm goin' too!" Sam said, breaking their eye contact. Steve's grin grew. "And you're paying for me, Rogers. I spent my day off helping your sorry asses."

Steve laughed from his belly and finally pulled away from Bucky. "Fine, but you gotta help break tables down."

Sam squawked about labour laws and demanding a break that just made Steve laugh harder. Bucky smiled, watching him. Maybe, Mrs. Keith was on to something. Maybe Sam was, too.

Hell, maybe Bucky was.

Maybe.

* * *

 ** _A/N: One more after this, maybe two. Dunno yet. Let you know what you thought!_**


	4. Cute Cat Sweaters

**_HUD: Gonna be one more chapter after this._**

* * *

"Wanna grab some food?" Steve asked Bucky. The firefighter had just buzzed up; Bucky opened the door for him with Winter twirling between his legs. He was dressed in a shirt Bucky had never seen him wear before, and it looked soft and brought out his eyes.

"Now?" Bucky asked, gesturing slightly with his free hand to his attire. He stuck his foot out to keep Winter from barreling at Steve. Bucky knew Steve didn't mind Winter's fur, but he looked so nice and Bucky hadn't bought a new lint roller in a few days.

Steve nodded, leaning his shoulder against the door jam. "Yeah. I wanna not cook."

Bucky bit his bottom lip, looking down at himself. He wore worn sweats and a tank with a hole in the armpit. He knew he needed a shower, and maybe a shave, and would that be too much?

"I might be a minute," Bucky hedged, feeling somewhat nervous. Steve just smiled his beautiful smile and nodded.

"That's fine, Buck. I don't have reservations or anything," the blond answered. Bucky finally nodded and stepped aside to let Steve in. Winter immediately pounced on the man, weaving between his legs and mewling to be picked up. Steve chuckled and relented, bending down to grab the kitten. Bucky clicked his tongue at her.

"What?" Steve asked with humour, light dancing in his eyes.

"She's spoiled," Bucky murmured, turning into his living room as Steve laughed behind him.

"Like you're one to talk!" Steve announced. Bucky shrugged.

"Guilty."

Bucky spent all of twenty minutes getting ready, pulling his damp hair back into a loose bun at his neck and shrugging on a grey sweater. He trimmed his beard back to the standard stubble he'd decided he liked before stepping into his living room again. Steve was on the couch with Winter, patting at her back as she lolled around on his lap.

Bucky sighed and shook his head. "You say _I_ spoil her?"

Steve looked up and blinked, his eyebrows drawing up slightly. Bucky shifted his weight, unable to read Steve's expression, until the man came back to himself and grinned. "Guess I'm guilty, too."

Bucky just shrugged and patted his thigh until Winter dislodged herself from Steve and flounced over to him. He attached her harness in the kitchen and grabbed his shoes from the hallway. Steve stood there and watched, his arms crossed over his chest as he leaned against Bucky's couch.

"Think she'll be okay in the cold?" Steve asked. Bucky looked down at his cat, her eyes bright and wide as they looked back at him. She was still small for her age, and Bucky knew she wouldn't really get any bigger. The idea of leaving her behind made his chest constrict in a very painful way, so he nodded.

"Yeah, I think so. I'll just carry her."

Bucky stooped to do just that and grabbed his wallet, keys, and phone on the way out. He paused for a moment, moving Winter to his left hand to lock the door, when Steve just gently took his keys from his hand and took care of it for him.

"You've got a lot goin' on, there," Steve said, and all Bucky could do was nod, because Steve hadn't showered at his place, he must have showered at the fire department or his apartment and without being prepared for it, Steve's body wash always took Bucky's breath away. It was a woodsy apple scent that was honestly the nicest thing Bucky'd ever had the pleasure to be around; and Steve was still standing close, still partially leaning over Bucky's shoulder, still holding his keys -

"Ready?" Steve asked, and then he was stepping back but he still had Bucky's keys. In fact, he was tucking Bucky's keys into his back pocket.

"Yeah," Bucky answered. Steve nodded, smiled, and set off a little ahead of Bucky. Bucky's eyes pulled to the lump of his keys in Steve's pocket and couldn't help but think about how nice they looked there.

* * *

Turned out it _was_ getting a little too cold for Winter. She shivered against Bucky all night, and when it was time to head back, Bucky hailed a cab for her.

"I'm sorry, Buck," Steve said softly, once they were on their way back to Bucky's apartment. Bucky held his little kitty close to his chest, unclipping her harness and raising up a bit to shove it into his pocket.

"Not your fault," he answered with a grunt. Once he settled back down, he coaxed Winter to crawl under his sweater. "I thought she'd be okay, too."

Steve watched Winter until she poked her head out of the collar of Bucky's sweater, her little face pressed against the hollow of his throat. "We should've stayed in."

"Nah," Bucky said, shaking his head. He dropped his palm over Winter's face and rubbed her ears, enjoying her purrs. "Didn't wanna cook, either."

Steve grinned and chuckled. "She looks warm, there."

Bucky shrugged but smiled. "I'm certainly warmer for it."

Steve watched them for a few moments before he leaned back in his seat, presumably calm again. "Maybe we could get her a sweater? Do they _make_ sweaters for cats?"

Bucky rested his chin on Winter's head and hummed. "Dunno. I'll look."

Once they were back in Bucky's warm apartment (Steve opened the door and set Bucky's keys on the kitchen counter without a word), Bucky pulled over his laptop and sat with Steve and Winter on the couch.

Apparently yes, cat sweaters were a thing, and yes, Bucky bought three. One to match her eyes, one grey one, and one that was bright red.

"You'll have to bring her by the department in the red one," Steve said, stretching out over the couch. "Bet the guys'll love seein' her as bright as a fire truck."

Bucky closed the lid of his laptop after paying for expedited shipping. Steve's socked toes grazed his thigh. "They'll be here in two days."

Steve's lips twisted in a frown. "I'll be on call then; won't be able to watch her model them."

"I'll take pictures of 'em," Bucky said; he pushed his laptop to the coffee table and grabbed the television remote instead. "Wanna watch somethin'?"

"Brooklyn Nine-Nine?" Steve asked hopefully, and Bucky couldn't help but grin. It was one of those silly comedies that Steve openly loved but Bucky only tolerated because Steve wanted to watch it. "There's that one where Amy goes to prison and I couldn't finish it at work - "

"Yeah, Brooklyn Nine-Nine's fine, Stevie," Bucky said and passed the remote over. He knew Steve would be smiling - when _didn't_ Steve smile? - as he turned on Hulu and scrolled to where he'd left his episode off at work. Winter crawled up onto Bucky's lap now that the laptop was gone and curled into a little ball.

Bucky let his mind wander as they watched Steve's program, listening to Steve's chuckles and Winter's shallow breathing. The episode rolled into the next on autoplay, and Bucky moved to pull his legs under him. He nudged Steve in the process and breathed a low 'sorry', only to look over and see that Steve was sleeping.

Bucky couldn't help but sigh. Steve really was beautiful, almost painfully so while he slept. He had one of those strong arms tossed over his head and resting on the arm of Bucky's couch, his face tilted towards the tv. His lips were slightly parted, his eyelashes long and dark on his pale skin, and his usually perfect hair mussed from sliding down in his sleep. He made Bucky smile, made Bucky's chest tighten; Bucky wrapped a hand around Winter and stood up. She wriggled for a moment until Bucky rested her in the crook of his elbow. Bucky grabbed the blanket, the one Steve's mom made him but, according to Steve, Bucky didn't know that; he draped it over his unconfirmed roommate. Steve all stretched out was two feet too tall for the blanket, but Bucky made it work. He left the tv on, set the remote on the couch by Steve's other hand, and turned off the lights. It wasn't late by any means, but Steve always crashed after his longer shifts, and Bucky wasn't adverse to getting more sleep.

He took Winter with him and left the door open a crack. He could still see Steve after he changed and settled into bed. The light from the tv flashed against the blanket over his legs, and after a few minutes of watching, Steve stretched and rolled over. Bucky watched until sleep finally took over, his thoughts curious about whether or not Steve would agree if Bucky asked him to join him, Winter curled against the small of his back.

* * *

Bucky was wary to take Winter out until her sweaters came in. Steve, being the kind soul he was, offered to go out and get whatever Bucky needed.

"I need to run by my apartment for something anyway; just give me a list." Bucky huffed but did as he was asked, writing up a light list of food and supplies for the next few days, at least as long as Steve would be around.

"You stayin'?" Bucky asked before he handed over his list. Steve shuffled his feet, standing in his boots and FDNY zipper hoodie in the hallway between Bucky's kitchen counter and the front door.

"Is that okay?" He asked, and there was so much hope in his tone that Bucky couldn't have said no even if he really, truly, wanted to. He never wanted Steve to leave, not if he could help it.

Bucky nodded and jotted something else down before passing the list over. "Figured I'd make a cake."

Steve practically beamed at him, looking down at the list in his hand. "Apples? Apple cake?"

Bucky nodded, feeling heat steal up his neck at his friend's enthusiasm. Steve's beaming grin tapered down to a soft smile. "Thanks, Buck. That's awfully nice of you."

Bucky shook his head. "Nah, just didn't wanna eat it alone. Go on, now."

Steve nodded and left, the door shutting softly behind him. Bucky counted to twenty before leaving the kitchen to jog into his bedroom, pulling on jeans and a jacket in record time. Winter danced around him, hopping up to put her paws on his thighs as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"Doll," Bucky said, kneeling to be closer to her. She sat back on her haunches and met his gaze. "I'll be right back; 's too cold for ya, and I'll only be five, ten minutes. 'Kay?"

Winter blinked her bright eyes at him and mewed. Bucky nodded and slipped into his running shoes. Winter followed him to the door, using the back of the couch to climb onto the counter. She pawed at her harness and stared at Bucky.

Bucky sighed through his nose. "I'll be back. I promise."

Winter let out a pitiful meow when Bucky grabbed his keys. He knew that she knew he was skipping a step, but he had to. He had to be back before Steve, and it was too cold for her outside. She jumped from the counter to follow after him, trotting to run right beside his long strides. Bucky sighed and scratched behind her ears one last time before quickly opening his door and slipping out. As he locked it, he could hear Winter's confused meow; it started softly before increasing in volume until even at the elevator, Bucky could hear her.

"I'll be back soon, baby," he murmured, willing the elevator to be faster so he wouldn't have to listen to his beautiful kitten crying.

Bucky was out on the street and down to the hardware store around the corner in only a few minutes. Steve was long gone, so Bucky wasn't worried about being seen. He grabbed a few odds and ends for his toolbox, things he'd been needing to get, while they worked on his order. When he heard his name, he brought his goods to the counter and paid; he was back in his apartment five minutes later.

Winter trotted up to him like he'd been gone for five years instead of fifteen minutes. He dropped his brown sack on the counter and wrapped her up in his arms, sighing when she burrowed and nuzzled his neck. She shivered a little from how chill his metal arm was from the cold, but Bucky moved into the apartment and changed back into his loungewear, putting away all of his odds and ends one-handed, still holding Winter to his chest.

He settled into the couch right when his phone went off, pinging with a text from Steve.

 _Be there in 10._

Bucky smirked. _Don't threaten me, punk._

 _What're you gonna do, jerk? ;)_

Bucky settled in with his kitten and the television remote, waiting for Steve to request to be buzzed up.

* * *

Bucky chopped apples while Steve cut mushrooms and peppers and onions for the fajitas he added to the list. Bucky had opted to make dinner for them as well, considering it being Steve's last day off before another four days on call at the department, but Steve insisted. Steve talked about how slow it had been, as far as emergencies went.

"I'm glad, ya know? That I don't have to go out for anything major. A few days ago it was just a few general calls, ones all of us have to show up for. There was a suicide watch on a kid at an orphanage, but the police were able to stabilize him before we had to stage a rescue." Steve scraped his veggies into a sizzling pan, mixing in spices Bucky didn't know the names of before Steve showed up. "Hopefully it'll continue that way."

Bucky nodded as he coated his slices in melted brown sugar and butter mixture. "Safer that way, too."

Bucky never really mentioned being concerned for Steve when he left; it was something that came along with the job, something Bucky understood very well. With the somewhat recent acceptance of Steve in Bucky's life, Bucky didn't want to imagine what a Steve-shaped hole in his life would do to him.

"Yeah," Steve breathed, and when Bucky turned around to grab something from the fridge, he realized Steve was looking at him. Bucky hesitated and blinked at Steve, who was sporting another of those unreadable expressions that Bucky noticed was being more commonplace than it should be. Steve was his friend - probably his _best friend,_ if he were being honest - and he should be able to read Steve better than he had been, lately.

"You okay, man?" Bucky asked, trying to pretend that Steve's eyes on him weren't causing him to think about how his lips would feel against his neck.

"Yeah," Steve said in that same breathy tone, so Bucky swallowed and continued moving to the fridge to grab a bottle of water. "Just thinkin'."

"What 'bout?" Bucky asked; he wasn't so sure he wanted to know after the question was out of his mouth.

Steve turned back to stirring their dinner. "Nothin' really worth mentioning."

Bucky nodded and continued his portion of their meal. They fell into companionable silence, the only sounds the sizzle of food or Winter's purring as she watched them from the counter.

* * *

 _"Shit."_

Bucky glanced over at Steve and watched the blond futilely attempt to sop up the beer on his shirt. Bucky stood from his seat on the couch and walked into the kitchen. He grabbed a hand towel and handed it over the couch to Steve, who again attempted to clean his shirt. He fumbled again, spilling more beer over his shirt and onto Bucky's couch.

"Aw, shit, Bucky," Steve murmured. He looked up at Bucky with earnest eyes and frowned. "I'm so sorry."

"'S okay, man," Bucky said. He smiled when Steve kind of pouted at him. "It's just beer; it'll come out. Go change and I'll clean up."

Steve sighed but stood up, moving around Bucky towards his room and bathroom. Bucky listened to Steve open his closet door and rummage around before moving into the bathroom and closing the door with a soft click. Bucky pushed Winter away while he dabbed at the beer, finally setting down a fresh towel to soak up what he couldn't. Steve came back in dressed in his sleeping sweats and a black tank.

"I suppose I deserve that," he offered, grinning. Bucky hummed at him while he took the soiled hand towels to the washing machine and dryer in an alcove beside the kitchen. "Shouldn't be drinking when I need to get up so early."

"Nah, it's just 'cos you're a clutz, Rogers," Bucky offered drily. Steve's laughter echoed across the apartment. Bucky shut the lid on the washing machine and walked back into the living room.

"That's true, too, and now I've got to sleep in it," Steve said with a sigh. "Thanks for the extra towel."

Bucky shifted his weight and decided to take a chance. He couldn't let Steve sleep on his beer-soaked couch the night before he had four days in on call. He was his friend - friends don't let friends sleep on beer-soaked couches.

"Sleep with me," Bucky offered. Steve spun around so quickly that Bucky thought he would have gotten whiplash. "That is," Bucky said, realizing what he said. And how it sounded. "We can share my bed. It's big enough, uh, as long as ya don't mind Winter hoggin' the covers - "

"You're serious?" Steve asked, holding up a hand to stop Bucky's rant. "You don't mind?"

Bucky swallowed. "Yeah, I wouldn't offer if I minded." Besides, Bucky could think of a lot worse things than sharing a bed with Steve Rogers.

Steve smiled slowly, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Sure. Thank you, Buck."

Bucky nodded and led the way to his room for both Winter and Steve, pushing the door open slightly wider than usual. He was trying to make himself feel better about this, trying to calm his nerves. He and Steve shared a sink to brush their teeth, and Bucky laid down first to get comfortable while Steve washed his face. Winter jumped up and curled against his stomach; Bucky had his back to the empty space, to where Steve would lay.

Finally, the covers shifted and Steve slipped in, his weight already comfortable for Bucky. Steve reached over and turned off the lamp on Bucky's bedside table, plunging the room into darkness, save for the soft lights of the city managing to work through Bucky's blackout curtains. He attempted to calm his heart, fairly positive that Steve would be able to hear it in the silence.

"I don't," Bucky said, pausing. "Sometimes, I don't sleep well."

"I understand," Steve said softly, and Bucky realized that he actually did.

"Just," Bucky said shakily, careful to keep his back to Steve as he spoke. "If it happens, don't touch me. Just get away."

"I won't," Steve answered, and Bucky rolled over to look at him. Steve's eyes were shining in what light there was in the room. "I won't leave you alone."

Bucky bit his bottom lip. "I've got Winter - "

"And me," Steve added, almost to soft for Bucky to catch. He seemed to realize that, and said stronger: "You've got me, Buck."

Bucky didn't know what to say - he could only just stare at Steve, his hair mussed from washing his face and using Bucky's pillow. He was still so beautiful it almost hurt Bucky. He wasn't sure what he'd done to deserve such a kind man in his life, let alone as a friend, but Bucky had been working on his gratitude lately.

"An' you've got me, Stevie," Bucky answered, smiling softly. Steve smiled back at him, settling into Bucky's bed with a sigh.

"'Night, Buck."

"'Night, Stevie."

* * *

That night, Bucky woke with a jolt. He was suddenly warm, warmer than usual, even with the heat on. There was a weight settled across his waist that was too heavy to be Winter sleeping oddly, and a tickle at his neck. When Bucky reached back to scratch it, his fingers brushed a slightly stubbled jaw; he forced himself to freeze.

 _Steve._ It was Steve, behind him, draping his arm around him. The tickle was his warm breath on Bucky's neck, and the slight touch on his chin birthed a sigh from Steve that was both sweet and agonizing. Bucky realized that warmth was Steve's solid chest against his back, raising and falling. Bucky swallowed and attempted to relax. Steve's steady breathing helped, and soon Bucky was able nearly to sleep again.

Steve held him just a little tighter, and if Bucky curled his hand around Steve's forearm, well, he could blame it on sleeping.

* * *

 ** _A/N: Thoughts? :)_**


	5. PSA

Hey everyone - I'm sorry to have to do this, but this site just isn't cutting it for me. I have top of the line EVERYTHING, and yet I'm having the hardest time in the WORLD uploading things to this site. The other morning I had a chapter up no problem, and now I'm having the worse time. I can't file upload, I can't copy/paste; I can't even make the chapter title and then add in the body later. Anything over 3k words is a struggle, and I can't deal with it. I really can't. I've even downloaded another internet browser and I'm still having the same problem. And I swear, if it's because I have a Mac, then this site is biased. Seriously.

But aside from my mini-rant, I want to thank you all for all your comments and follows and everything you've all given me over the years. I'm still writing, and I'm on Archive of Our Own under the same handle, zombified419. You can find me there, and I hope you all do still wanna read some of my unfinished things. If you don't like that site, just follow me on tumblr, also under zombified419, if you wanna follow for updates. If any of you know a 'fix' for my issues, by all means send me a message. I'm not doing this because I want to. Thank you all so much.

I hope to see you all on ao3 or tumblr! :)

\- zombified419


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